Sometimes You Win, Sometimes You Learn

As a blogger I have done a terrible job lately.  Really, terrible.  I thank the readers who have stuck around.  {Thank you!} In the past two months I have been plagued with migraines which made keeping my eyes open impossible and being on the computer was not even an option.  At my yearly physical my doctor felt a large lump on my thyroid.  I had to have a thyroid ultrasound…which lead to getting a fine needle aspiration (FNA) at the hospital to check for cancer.  The day before that happened I was diagnosed with strep throat.  My FNA results came back with all benign cells, which is great news (you can’t ask for better).  To put the bow on top of it all, I ran a  half marathon 4 days after being diagnosed with strep throat/3 days after having my fine needle aspiration.  Perhaps it wasn’t my smartest idea.

You see, I had been training for this half marathon for months.  My husband was running this race too.  We even hired a babysitter so we could go to downtown Atlanta to run the Georgia (Half) Marathon together.  I didn’t want to quit because of some silly strep throat.  The day of the race it rained….basically every minute I was in downtown Atlanta there was some sort of water falling from the sky (mostly light drizzle, but it did actually turn to heavier rain towards the end).

My husband asked what my time goal was.  I was adamant that I didn’t want to run this half marathon (all 13.1 miles) as a personal worst.  I really wanted my time to be under 2 hours and 12 minutes (which is actually my personal worst).  We started the race on track for being awesome.  Then my exercise induced asthma kicked in and I needed my inhaler.  I needed is many more times on the course.  I made my husband race without me…I wasn’t going to drag him down too.  I walked and ran.  I watched one pace group pace me, then another.  I became more and more defeated.  Looking down at my Garmin I watched my goal time pass.  I knew this was my worst race EVER.  I was failing, and I was failing in a big way.  As I stepped through the finish line I wanted to cry for doing so poorly…while laughing at myself.  I wasn’t one bit proud of my accomplishment.  It was all I could do to hold in my tears.

Sometimes you win.  Sometimes you LEARN.

 

I didn’t want to talk about this race with my friends.  I still don’t.  It hurts my heart to think about doing my worst job ever.  I know I could have been better.

I also know I had strep throat…..and breathing problems.

Instead of being proud that I ran 13.1 miles in downtown Atlanta I spent a few days being miserable that I did my worst.  I wallowed in my own self pity.  I had a me party (that’s a Muppets reference).

I have realized that I didn’t fail.  I LEARNED.  I learned about being positive in tough times, accepting sub-par conditions, and about being gracious to myself.

Life has a way of being hard. Budgeting is hard.  Being a good parent is hard.  Eating healthy is hard.  Making good decisions is hard.  Finding time is hard.  It’s all so incredibly hard.  Sometimes we feel like nothing we do is right.  But let me tell you this, so much of it IS RIGHT!

Life is what we make of it.  We need to make each day count.  Fill our days with goodness, laughter, smiles.  Tuck away the sadness and disappointment.  Sometimes we’re too quick to count down the days that we forget to make the days count.

A tiny step is all it takes to create a snowball effect in your life.  Will you make today count?

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